Online dating hell
Friends of both genders tell that their experiences have been hard in different ways.
, we’d like to assume you know better than to make mistakes like these.Still, navigating the world of online dating can definitely be tricky—what kind of message is clever, but not creepy?What the hell are you supposed to say about yourself in your profile? [pagebreak] OUT-OF-TOWN AND OUT OF TOUCH The scenario: “A guy sent me a message saying that he wanted to meet up for a drink, but when I asked when he was free, he said he was ‘going out of town’ for the next two weeks and that we should schedule something after.” — Andrea, 31 The problem..the solution: If you tell a girl you’re “going out of town,” she’s going to assume you’re busy dating other women.I was curious as to what your real opinion is of online dating.I did meet my girlfriend online, but after a year of painful struggle, meaning hardly any dates despite being educated, employed, and reasonably attractive.No cell phone back then, so I was stranded out at the reservoir with a loser who clearly had no respect for me. There was a huge filthy mess of dishes in the kitchen, and a mountain of dirty laundry in the bedroom."You can start wherever you want," he said, and flicked on the TV.
I felt beyond "used." I had to give plasma so we could go on this crappy outing and then I got sick so he proceeded to drink all the beer! ) I was very naive and I felt so embarrassed for him, that he thought that this was even remotely close to acceptable human behavior, that I downplayed the whole event and tried to pretend it had never happened. When I asked what the h--- he meant, he replied that in India, the women do all the cleaning, so I'd better get started. I did a summer internship at a museum years ago when I was in college.
Dear Geoff, Glad to hear you found someone special, and even happier that you spoke up.
Most of the people that write about online dating write about what’s wrong with it. I mean, that’s what news is – emphasize the bad, misery loves company, etc.
A good rule of thumb: if you aren’t available for a date within 7 days of sending the message, don’t send it.
NOT-SO-SMOOTH OPERATOR The scenario: “I recently received a message that said, ‘Damn you’re a pretty white girl, you into muscular black men?
’” — Kristen, 27 The problem..the solution: Aside from the obvious inappropriate nature of the comment to a complete stranger, men should never mention their physical characteristics or their own body parts in an introductory message.