Dating after herpes
When to tell: Just like a date’s 401K balance is none of your business, a bankruptcy is none of theirs—unless it impacts them directly.“The only way I’d ever tell someone is if I was buying property with her,” says Chris.
It’s much harder to tell someone if they just found out they’re infected with herpes.Because fear of rejection is a concern, it leads some to question why they should risk talking about herpes. Instead they abstain during herpes outbreaks, practice safe sex at other times, and hope for the best.This strategy may have more disadvantages than advantages.“Even though this happened three years ago, it still affects my dating life today,” he explains.Once confident with women, he’s convinced himself that women wouldn’t want to date a man with money trouble.For most people, the anxiety over not telling your partner you have herpes is worse than the telling itself.
On the other hand, by telling your partner you have herpes and allowing them to enter into the relationship with full knowledge of your infection, you reduce the likelihood of them becoming infected with herpes.
If ok, want to jump on my soapbox for a second, if anyone reading this has herpes, do the right thing, let people know. As far as genital herpes goes, we’re talking 20% of the population.
One of the most difficult things I had to do was call former boyfriends I may have exposed (think it was dormant in my system for quite sometime, I honestly did not know). I think all the readers should take a second to put themselves in your shoes for a moment. That’s 50 MILLION people, a majority of whom don’t even know they’re infected.
Once a struggling musician, Chris, 40, of Los Angeles, CA, leaned heavily on credit cards to make ends meet.
“But before long, I was in over my head, and I couldn’t even pay the minimum balances,” he recalls; he was forced to declare bankruptcy.
ED: When I was diagnosed, the person I was dating was the classic college boy.