49 and dating 35 year old women
It’s no secret that dating changes radically as you get older.
(This is code for, “I dread clingy girls who abandon their own ships the moment we have sex, and set up camp on my shore.”) Also, the fact that an older woman has her own money means she likely worked hard to get it. You may buy into the idea that all older women are “desperate.” Granted, some are. This doesn’t mean she doesn’t want marriage/kids, because she might—but if so, she’ll be pretty clear about it up front. “Oh, I haven’t met her yet,” he’d responded, deadpan, over dinner.But I’ve always found my old friend’s honesty refreshing, and rather insightful. See Bridget Jones 1 and 2; in 3, she’s a 51-year-old widow, cougar and mother of two.“Perception is that it’s perfectly acceptable for a man to be single and dating because he was likely concentrating on his career and is now ‘ready,’” says one smart, fun, beautiful 34-year-old singleton in San Francisco — a city that is home to a seemingly disproportionate number of older, never-married men. Just no.)”Still, like many women, she continues to give ’em a go.“I’m getting married in fall 2013,” my 38-year-old friend John told me, when we caught up in Paris the summer before. “Because if you’re a single guy after that, it’s like, you know, ’What’s wrong with him? Very conscious of his life choices, of his — some might say — semi-misogynistic way with women. Or, rather, they are dissected, thoroughly examined — not by a class of seventh-graders using microscopes but by a table of 30-something women, well into their third bottle of wine. over the sad fact that never-married women of a certain age aren’t players; they’re pitied. “But I’ll be married by 40,” said the guy who’s deliberately been a player for the past two decades. But in a way, steadfastly heterosexual single men over 40 are sort of pitied too.There is nothing much worse than having built up a relationship online to then meet the object of your interest only to find them as exciting as a mollusc.
It feels as if you are constantly putting yourself on the line, showing off your wares, only to reel in another damp squib.
So if you’re only seeking women in the 21-29 age range, let me tell you, you’re missing out. And by that I mean: her own career, her own friends, her own apartment, her own money.
A 30-year-old man from Brooklyn told me these factors are what makes older women a turn on. If she hasn’t tried it herself, she’s likely considered it.
Because, as he said, he could eat it use it in his coffee instead of buying milk.” Also suspect: He once flew to see her in Portugal at a moment’s notice.
“It was really fun, but I kept asking him, ‘Is this, like, what you do? ’” Turned out he was an older, never-married guy with nothing to hide. Scarlett Letter-type mistrust.”He admits he’s grossly generalizing and then breaks it down: “There are two models.
Since my long-term relationship with the father of my children ended more than three years ago, I had tried various other dating websites (ones I paid for) and been on a handful of dates, but found them all soul-destroying in their own way.